doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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