In the future we'll all be gay
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
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