I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
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