so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
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I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
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We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
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