I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
