420 ftw
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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