remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
