I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize