New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
i believe in u and ur pee
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
