I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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