when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
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