I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Randomize
