Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Randomize
