dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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