he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
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