i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize
