Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize