Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
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