'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize