I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
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