Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
After last night, I could never be a politician.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
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