do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
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