Banned from zoo.
Again?
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize