You're completely useless in the revolution.
____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize