so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
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