You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Randomize
