just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize
