Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
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