Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
