her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
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