come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Randomize
