After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
the day after is always just damage control
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
