Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
