You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Rumble strips road head = magical
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
