We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
