Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Are we still banned from the library?
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
