Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Randomize
