Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Randomize