I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
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