What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
