I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
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