speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
