the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
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