That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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