My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
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