so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Randomize