I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
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