trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
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