My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
i think my cat just said my name.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize
