I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
