I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Randomize
